Monday, November 7, 2011

In Which Some of Us Are 27 Months Old

Kristin bumps her head and says Ow.
Codename: Phoenix: Kristin, did you break your crown while you were fetching a pail of water?

Codename: Joe is driving the car, at a reasonable pace. Codenames: Phoenix and Isis are in the back seat.
Phoenix (screaming): GO FAST! GO FAST!
Isis (screaming): SLOW DOWN! SLOW DOWN!

I am reading Death Comes for the Archbishop on my e-book reader. Phoenix, awake from her nap, wanders in. I put the device to sleep immediately and close it inside its case, but not before she sees.
Phoenix: What you doing, Kristin? Are you reading your book?
Me: Yes, Phoenix, I am reading my book.
Phoenix: Can I see it?
Me (holding it so she can see): Yes, you can see it.
Phoenix: Can I just hold it?
Me: You can hold it for a minute, but then you have to give it back to Kristin.
Phoenix (holding the reader in delight): Can I just open it?
Me: The book is sleeping now, Phoenix. We need to let it sleep.
Phoenix: Can I just see it sleeping?
Me (opening the case): We can look at it once, but then we need to close it and let it sleep.
Phoenix (in delight): Can I press the buttons?
Me (beginning to whisper): No, we can't press any buttons. We have to close it now and let it sleep and be very quiet so it doesn't wake up.
Phoenix (whispering): Can I just press two buttons?
Me (whispering): Okay, you can press two buttons, but then we have to close it and let it sleep.
(Phoenix presses ALL the buttons while singing the alphabet song under her breath.)
Me: "...won't you come and sing with me." (Taking the reader) Okay, we need to let it sleep now.
Phoenix: Can I see it later?
Me: Maybe later.
(I stand up and place the reader out of sight on a high shelf. Isis wanders in and spots it before I'm able to conceal it.)
Isis: What you doing, Kristin? Can I see your BOOK?